Episode 47: Using the “As If” Principle to Manifest Your Dreams

Emma-Louise Parkes: [00:00:00] Hello, welcome to this solo episode of the Ambitious Introvert Podcast. Thank you so much for joining me today and I’m going to be discussing a trip that I took back in June. Which I called my as if trip. And if you are on the email list, member of the ambitious introvert network, Facebook group, or you follow me on Instagram, it’s very likely you will have seen this.

I also mentioned it in the podcast a month ago and the Q2 Roundup briefly, but I really wanted to make sure that I dedicated a whole show to this because it definitely peaked a lot of people’s interest. I had a lot of questions around it and it’s a practice. That I absolutely swear by I have done for years for myself and for my clients.

So it deserves its own ad time. So here we are. I ain’t going to take you behind the scenes of what was my, as if trip. So I’m going to tell you all about what actually as F means why I chose the trip that I did and other ways that you can incorporate it into life. If that’s not practical for you, right.

I’m going to share behind the scenes of what I actually did while I was on my trip. And what thought process was behind it? Because it was very intentional to create a specific outcome. I’m going to fill you in on what’s happened since I had the trip. And discuss some of the mindset challenges around taking this kind of time and space for yourself and for your future growth and some ways to overcome them and also share how my own plants incorporate as if into their everyday life and business, because like anything it’s not just a one-off event.

Now, the first thing I’m going to say is back pre COVID. And obviously now the world is opening up a little bit. Business retreats were huge, and I can see that they are going to be again. And this is the exact reason because what business retreats do is they give us an opportunity to live as if so retreats are usually held in.

Very luxurious space. We travel to them. It’s something slightly outside of our comfort zone that we wouldn’t usually do. We get to be surrounded by other people that are in that energy of wanting to create amazing lives and businesses for themselves. We get to learn, we get to be around people all the time.

So it really puts us into that level as F and I know a lot of people who say they’ve had really quantum shifts after attending business retreats. And that’s really why, because it opens you up to your future self and that possibility for you. Now I learned about acting as if from my absolute favorite book that I will recommend till the end of the earth, which is the success principles by Jack Canfield.

If you have not read the success principles, highly, highly, highly recommended. I don’t care if you have never read a personal development book or you’ve been reading them for 20 years, like I have, it has everything in that. It’s just such a good, basic book that covers. So much of life and business and mindset and energy and thoughts, like it’s all in there.

I reread it at least once a year, go through the exercises. And as I say, wherever you are on your personal development or business journey, there’s no way you would not get value from it. So highly recommended. Anyway, one of Jack’s things is living as if, so this is where I got the idea from years and years ago.

And the premise behind it is if you do what you’ve always done, then you’ll get what you’ve always got. So if we don’t slightly stretch ourselves outside of our comfort zone, or if we don’t try something new, then we’re going to stay in the same place. And obviously what we’re looking at here is growth.

So what do you want for your future? And that can be future you in six months and a year in 10 years, whatever, but it’s really getting intentional and looking forwards to say, what do I want, how do I want to feel, how do I want to act? What do I want to have? And really creating that future vision, which if you’re an intuitive introvert, like me should be really easy.

Cause we spent a lot of time inside our heads. So what Jack recommends is taken the energy because of course energy is everything of that feeling rather than just create an vision board or writing a list of, oh, in a year’s time I want to have this and I want to do this. Like what can you do today to get into the energy of that future self?

Because. Energy is everything in the manifestation process. And it also gives us that taste and that drive to be like, I loved that and I want that to be my everyday life. So I chose a four day trip to London as my, as if trip. Now there are many other ways you can do this instead, which I’m going to cover a bit later on, but I just want to share with you the thought process behind my own.

So I chose four day trip, which could be seen as quite extreme, but one of the reasons for this was COVID pre COVID. I used to travel extensively, both for work and pleasure, maybe every six to eight weeks per blade on average. And then since last March, I hadn’t left, I haven’t left the country. I’ve had a few day trips to London.

I don’t think I’ve even been overnight anywhere in the UK. So there’s been a massive change. As it has for so many people. But what I’d really noticed is that my energy felt really stagnant traveler, been apart of my life for 20 years, um, on almost that regular basis. And they didn’t realize how much.

Energy I got from it, although it can be very tiring, which is another story, but just from being in different environments and being exposed to different cultures and seeing different interiors, all of those things, I just hadn’t realized how much that actually inspires me and lights me up. So as much as I love my home, I really felt that I needed a really good energy shakeup.

That was just more than a day or two. Which is why I decided to do four days. Um, I’m also currently working with 15 plants. It’s gone up slightly now, but actually when I took the trip, I had 15 plants. So I know that I need to be at my best to be able to give them the best service that they deserve. So.

The whole, you know, looking after yourself first and making sure your cup’s full, et cetera. Like if I’m not taking the time that I need to concentrate on myself and my own business, then I’m not going to be able to give them the things that they need to be able to grow themselves and their business. So that was a really important thing for me to know that I needed to take that space in order to be at my best for those 15 amazing clients.

So if you’re thinking that’s great, but I can’t do four day trip or I can’t get to London or whatever the things are there. Know that there are many different ways that you can do this. So you could live as F for a day. Or for an afternoon, or even for one meal, you could just make it that once a month, you go out for that one meal and you go to the place that you would go to as your future best self, and you dress as you would want to dress.

And you order the food that you would want to order, and you have the conversation of a dinner that you would want to have. It can be that simple. But as I say, just because of what’s been going on, I decided to immerse myself. So I went four days and I’m going to share a little bit about why. And those four days and the thought process behind it, as I say, it was all very intentional, um, not to the point of being, you know, micromanaged out to the second, but I really wanted to make sure that I did submerge myself in the energy that I wanted.

And I really got what I needed from that trip, which I did. So the first thing was choosing the hotel and I chose the hotel that I’d held on my vision board for months, absolutely months, if not years. And always looked at it because of COVID. I was extremely lucky that they actually had an offer on. So the price that I paid for four nights was actually the price that was just a little over what one night would usually be.

So I’d had this, this hotel and this room on my vision board, it’s called cafe Royal and London. Um, if you want to look it up right on Regent street, uh, it was amazing. And I’ve said, I mean, I’ve stayed in beautiful hotels all over the world before, but this, this was up there and it always been on the list.

So I decided it was time to do it. And the room that I’d had on my vision board was actually. The second or third room up in class, I think. And the investment on that room was a lot more. Now I’m not saying it wasn’t worth it, but to fund this trip, it was a stretch. It wasn’t just, oh, I’ll take it out of my current account because that’s the whole point.

Right. You know, or if I was doing that, I wouldn’t be living as F in the future. I would be living now. So I booked the lower room category, which was still beautiful. Um, but instantly had in my mind that I knew that I wanted this room because it had an amazing bath tub, and this is the room I’d had on my vision board and also Linden to the mantra that I always get upgraded, which is something that I’ve been using for years now and works very, very well.

So I turned up at the hotel and of course I got upgraded and I got upgraded to the exact room that was on my vision board, which was amazing. Also, I completely expected that. So energetically felt great, but also. Yeah, of course, of course I’m getting this room. So that was amazing. Another great thing about this hotel is that it’s really near to whole foods market.

Now I am a massive fan of whole foods market, and whenever I go away to the states, first thing I do is like, right. Where’s the hotel in relation to whole foods market in Austin. I think I spent about three hours. And whole foods at the mothership because I adore it so much. So this is a big thing to me, love whole foods.

And in my dream future life, I would shop at whole foods. Like I’m not too worried about how this is going to happen, whether it’s whole foods here in the UK, whether I moved in the states, whether it gets delivered or what, but I just know that that is a business that I’m very aligned with. And I absolutely love spending time.

So chose this hotel as well, because right next whole foods, amazing. I could just pop in there and get healthy food and snacks. The best thing was I actually had a view of whole foods from my room. So everything just worked out perfectly. Another great thing with this hotel was the location it’s right on Regent street.

So I’m the kind of border of Mayfair Soho, very, very central in London. My favorite part of London, and I chose it because ideally I love to walk. I absolutely adore walking. I don’t own a car anymore. As much as London is very well connected with the tube and taxis. I love being outdoors. I love moving. I love to walk.

So in an ideal life, that’s what I would be doing. That is exactly how I would get around. So I chose that location specifically and I did manage the whole, yeah, I did the whole four days without. Using the tube or a taxi, except for getting from the train station to, and from the hotel. I want to have my case, but the rest of the time I walked and it was great because they’d created this trip with not much limitation on time.

Um, so I had a few things, but 10, but generally it was very fluid. So it was just lovely to have that time and space to be able to walk. One of the other things I did during my time was I had a VIP in-person session with one of my clients. So in-person coaching is something I did a lot of before. COVID, um, pretty much exclusively in-person actually.

It’s been a huge change for me bringing the business online. And it’s something that I definitely want more of. I really, really love that experience of coaching someone in person one-to-one, um, especially in like beautiful environment and really inspiring them, uh, to uplift and to look, you know, for their future and be the best be that best selves.

So I did exactly. Yeah. My amazing client came and we had an intensive session in person and mapped out, uh, her next three months in business, which was incredible. Another thing I did was I ate lots of seafood, which may sound odd. Um, two things to this intuitively around that, that week. Kind of cravings for seafood.

I felt very much like I wanted to eat a lot of efficiency, food, and obviously London with everything being so accessible. I thought that was a really great place to lean into it. Uh, where I, um, yeah, we do have some sushi restaurants and, and things, and obviously fish and chips, but not to the same school.

So, what was really great is I managed to pick up some amazing sushi from whole foods. So I combined that and a lot of the restaurants I went to also had amazing seafood and fish options. So I could really lean into, into that. I went to my favorite jeweler. Also, I went to George Jensen, the Danish jeweler.

I’ve got two bracelets and two reds. Of George Jensen’s on my vision board. They’d been there for years. Um, so I went in and actually physically tried them on. Now, this is where we can leap from, you know, looking at something to dimension on a vision board or on the internet to actually be in that energy.

And so I went in, I tried them on, I got the lady to write down the sizes, et cetera. So I’ve got it there when I’m ready to order, it’s just taking those small steps towards. Being at that stage that I go, I’m buying that jewelry. So the really great thing is that I loved it all. I didn’t try any of it on and think, oh no, I’m not sure.

Really loved it. So try to arm fell into the energy left. Being in the shop, left talking to the ladies in there actually took pictures of me wearing. And then switched the pictures on my vision board out for that. So now what I’m seeing every day is not just the jewelry, but it’s myself wearing it. And I remember the energy of how it felt.

Um, so that was really, really great. And that is something that I would highly recommend if there’s something that you want, whether it’s a car. Uh, an item of furniture or, you know, an item of clothing, that’s a big investment. Like go and try it, go and try it on, go sit in it, sit on it, you know, whatever needs be to really be in the energy because, you know, sometimes we do it and we go, it’s not actually all that, but when we do it and go, yes, this feels great.

Then you’ve really ignited something and brought it even closer. Something else I did, which I had been trying to do for a long time is I created a spacious day day with no appointments at all. And I’ve been, like I say, I’ve been trying to do this for so long and I didn’t realize how difficult it would be.

Anyone with kids. I do not know. How they would manage this. It’s bad enough with pats and full coaching practice, but I was very, very intentional that I wanted a day where between the moment I woke up and went to sleep, I didn’t have to be at a certain place at a certain time. I didn’t have to open my laptop.

I didn’t have to, I didn’t have to do anything. Basically. It was completely my choice. So that was a really lovely day. I just got to wander around. I went to a couple of coffee shops that I seen. Um, they really liked the look of, I tried on some clothes. Um, I actually decided in the late afternoon to make a reservation for dinner because I then decided what type of food I would like.

So I managed to get a reservation for one, which was amazing. I went to the spa and the hotel. Again, I didn’t book that. I didn’t want to be, um, working around it, but I, I popped back to the hotel in the afternoon. Just asked if you had space and they did so really leaned into that. Like, what do I feel like doing, what do I get to do?

You know, totally my choice, which was amazing. Again. Really, you know, in modern life, let’s be honest, difficult to do, but not impossible. But how else could you do this? Like, could you make just two hours where you do whatever you feel like doing? Could you make half a day that you pencil out for yourself that you can do whatever you feel like?

So anyway, I managed to do the whole day and it was incredible. And the last thing I did before coming home was I met my. Best business friend, Amy Brown. And we had a full day of just amazing food and beautiful locations. Also lots of wine. And we did a kind of quarterly business mastermind that we do. So the two of us get together.

We’ve done it in person a few times, obviously on zoom. During COVID. But now that we are able to meet again, spend the whole day together and just really get clear on where we are in our business, what we want to achieve over the next three months, bounce ideas off each other, ask each other for advice, think things out, just really great space, um, and really great thing to do in a beautiful, beautiful, and.

So we’ve done a ham yard hotel in London before. Um, we started off in cafe Royal this time. Then we went over to 45 German street, which is one of my favorite, favorite, favorite restaurants in London. And then we had dinner at the Ivy as well and carried on the conversation that so really making sure that we are really high vibe and really future-focused.

So that was an incredible way to wrap up the four days. So now I’m going to share a bit about what’s happened since in my business. So as soon as they came back, I really felt inspired and I’ve had definite ideas for content and products, and I’ve actually launched a product since. But also for messaging and starting to look at like, what am I really talking about here?

What do I really want to say to people? What do I really want to be known for? So I think that energy shakeup definitely helped. And it definitely made me think longer term because if I’m looking at, oh, this is how many. In a year would live say, then I’m like, okay. So for me to live this way in a year’s time, the business has to be at X.

Like, what do I want the business to look like? How do I want to feel in the business? So it’s all so, so interlinked with energy and. I definitely felt that more clarity on my messaging. And as I say, inspiration and ideas, so really, really great for that. Um, I also have, since I got back actually in the month of July, um, secured multiple five figures in contracted sales, which is amazing.

Um, I don’t often do the money talk in that way about my own revenue, but these are like amazing clients that. I’m just thrilled to work with. And those contracted sales, some of them are short term. Some of them go through till January 20, 22, which is amazing. Now, these people didn’t sign because of my trip directly.

Like I’m not going to pretend that I went on the trip, put a picture of it and Instagram and someone went, oh, I need to work with you. Like, you know, here’s X number of thousands of pounds. It wasn’t like that. But I know that being on that trip definitely elevated. My vibration and it definitely focused my mindset in what I want and where I want to be.

Um, a hundred percent thousand percent because of that. Energetically helped me to attract these amazing, amazing plants. Something else it did. Is it highlighted ways that I can change my own routine now to add more of future men, which is something I will talk about at the end? Cause it’s something I do with my clients, but until we try something like we don’t know, we can do all the thinking and all of the research in the world, but until we actually step up and give it a go, we’re never going to know 100%, whether it feels good or whether we’re aligned with it.

So. Been out of my normal daily routine and especially having that spacious day, I think it really highlighted to me, like, what do I want to spend more time doing? What can I add into my daily routine that I did today? Because it feels really good. So what can I add in, without it feeling like, um, you know, another to do or something that I have to do?

What can I add in? Because I know that I chose to do it and it felt amazing. So there are without doubt, definitely mindset challenges around as if so, I’m going to share a couple of them that I have had myself over the years and that people who have reached out to me when they saw the trip reflected back to me, which are all like completely understandable.

The whole point is as if, is that you are stepping outside of your comfort zone. You’re not just carrying on your daily routine, you’re doing something that is completely alien and something that you really the wants. And that requires a very open mindset. And it requires a lot of trust. So as I say, It was not a trip that was very easily accessible.

I didn’t just take out my debit card and pay for it. Now, I’m not saying to anyone, you know, go into debt to do this or go into your savings or, you know, open a credit card or anything. It is absolutely not about that because living as if does not have to be expensive, but for what I wanted, I did need to make an investment, which was absolutely fine because.

And this is the biggest mindset shift around it. I trusted that the money would come back. So when I was making the bookends, when I was preparing for it, it never felt expensive and it never felt like a cost or that I was wasting money or anything like that because I want 101% belief. That when we invest in the right way.

And when we invest in our energy, that it always comes back to us. And it absolutely did because the sales that I have contracted between now and January, more than 10 times cover what I paid for the trip. So again, did did that cause them, did it create them. Yeah, it did maybe not directly, but definitely by me investing in myself and my energy and what I want it a hundred percent created those opportunities for me.

So I think the trust is the biggest thing. If we spend or invest in this type of activity, out of fear or feeling like. It’s not going to come back or it’s going to be a waste of money or what if it doesn’t work, then that’s a really different energy, but it takes practice, which is why it can be good to start with something small, like a meal.

But when I was doing it, I just didn’t doubt that it would come back. I had that 100% trust. And if I could say anything about the mindset of acting as if, or do you know doing a trip or a day. It’s the trust trust that you’ll get the results, trust that it’s exactly where you need to be and trust that anything you invest in it we’ll come back to you.

Other mindset challenge around it can be, oh, I don’t have time. And as I said earlier on like, I wanted to have this entire day with nothing and it has take, I read a book that recommended this about nine years. It’s taken me this long to do it. This is not easy. I completely appreciate that. And especially, you know, life is busy.

If you’ve got kids, if you’re still working at jobs, as well as building your business, you know, if you’re scaling your business and you’re in that real kind of frenzy of, you know, investing a lot of time into it, then you might think, but I don’t have time to, if you have to create the time. The time will never, ever, ever be there.

You need to carve it out. So whether it is the same as carving out, you know, 10 minutes a day to journal or carving out an hour, once a week for your call with your coach, whatever those things are, we ha we have to intentionally create the time for them. Um, I would agree with Jack Canfield in the success principles and say that this is something that is worthy of creating some time for.

So even if that means I take one less plan this month so that I can spend this time doing this work on myself and for myself, then find a way to create the time because. If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got. And we want to make sure that you’re getting in the future. The things that you really, really want.

So starting to take the action now is key to that. And then lastly, to wrap up, I wanted to share how my claim incorporate some as if into their everyday life and business. So a couple of things off the top of my head, one of my clients knew when she started her business, that. She wanted to have her hair done every X number of weeks.

She wanted to get a facial every month and she wants to get a massage every month or, or whatever the timeframe was. And when she left her corporate job and with the business, that felt like a stretch and it felt very, um, it felt very scary to spend that kind of money on herself on a regular basis. And then when we began working together, she’s had like quantum growth in her business in the last few months.

So one of the very first things that she did when she started to make more sales was to book those N because she knows that that’s what she wants. That is her future self has those things. And it’s a great way for her to. And then be at her best for her plans. So one of the practices that we have with her now is she read books.

These things like she’s there at the hairdresser. She doesn’t go. Oh, I’ll give you a call and wait, like three months to check. If she’s got the money available, she books the end. So every time she makes these recurring appointments, because that is just part of who she is, and that absolutely is living as if that is 100% an amazing way to do it.

Uh, give you an example with another client, which is more business-based but still works. So when she has decisions to make in her business or routine that she goes through is she makes the decision. So maybe it could be about hiring someone. Maybe it could be about investing in some software. Maybe it could be a button new package.

So she’ll see what decision comes up. And then she goes, what decision would I make? If I’m three years down the line and I have the business that I want three years down the line. So, obviously there’s always going to be limitations with this maybe financially, but generally she’s always able to make happen what she wants to be able to happen in three years time.

But it’s just knowing that if we’re making decisions from a place of today, that’s absolutely great. But. It can just stunt our growth and just stop us pushing slightly outside of our comfort zone. When we start to look at what business would I have in six months time, and what would I say to this opportunity then?

Or what would they say to this investment then? Or what would they say to those in a year’s time or three years’ time? Like whatever time span feels good for you, what this does is it just enables you to look at it from a different point of view and make sure that you’re starting to make those decisions for your future self and also for your future business.

So that’s everything I’ve got on my, as if trip. I really, really hope that that gave you a little bit of perspective and maybe inspired you somehow to be able to do some kind of activity to live as if, whether it’s a small activity every day, once a month. Big one-off event, whatever that is, to make sure that you are really getting into that energy.

I would love to hear from you. If that’s the case, you can drop me a DM on Facebook or Instagram. And of course, I’m going to pop in the show notes, the link to the success principles by Jack Canfield really, really recommend. Reading that even if you read a chapter of that a day and implemented exactly what he said, that would be a fantastic way to start living as if so.

Thank you guys. Thank you so much. If you enjoyed this episode, please do share on social media. Give me a little tag and I’ll be sure to shout you out and help me to reach as many ambitious introverts as possible.